Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Updates
Someone pointed out I hadn't posted in a week. whoa.
Let's see. Under the title ... no good deed ... I posted a bunch of the crap furniture still left at my parent's apt under free on Craigs List. Was to meet three different people there on Sunday. I couldn't believe the response. I was going to do freecycle but it was takign too long for the moderators to approve my membership so I just did Craigs List. One of the things I needed to get rid of was my mothers dresser and mirror which is too big for Glen Meadows. I called late art deco and posted a pic. Well, I could tell a lot of the responses were people who fix stuff and resell. Then a guy who says he has five kids and money is tight and they would love it ... well eventhough he wasn't first, (my barometer of who I would give what to) I told him he could have it and he was happy and he was the one who didn't show! So now I have to set up another time and this time I will give it to some little entrepreneur who will indeed show up. I still need to get the loveseat and cedar chest from there to here and I still haven't gone through the storage locker. ack. But we are getting there!
Under the title ... SOS ... we have a team meeting with Henry's teachers on Friday. They requested it. Already. Missy's response first off was that she couldn't possibly get off work to go and second that she didn't like the idea of him being labeled already. Um. He must be failing on his interims. I don't really think the teachers called a meeting just for the heck of it. Ah, I so missed this paranoia and problems this summer.
Under the title of ... how do I feel ... I must say ... with my hands. hah. I feel fine. Yesterday I did go to the cancer schmancer website of Fran Drescher who had the same cancer I did and how she is celebrating 7 years cancer free. In my mind it just feels like I had an operation. But I guess having to get a pap smear every three months for a couple of years will remind me that ... I am out of the woods but I can still see a tree or two.
Under the title of ... my parents ... well. I went there last Friday as they both had a doctor's appt with their doc. One of the few GOOD things my father actually has to say about anything is that their doc sees patients at Glen Meadows. They both put on a brave front and smile and everything is fine. I know I do that to some extent with my doc too but ... Then my cousin came to visit so I stayed and we all went to lunch in the cafeteria. She treated which made my father nuts (he is gracious with ... other people) but then she told me for the four of us it was less than $7!!!!!!!!!!!!! My cousin and my father each got chicken a la king and my mother and I had a salad. At these prices no wonder so many of the residents eat breakfast and lunch there!
They are overwhelmed by how friendly (nosey) everyone is. They really like to descend on fresh meat -- stopping by, inviting them to dinner (this is a big thing here but it kind of funny since it is free for everyone), helping them find their way around. Unfortunately with my mother's dementia and hearing issues, she just nods and smiles at people. She will not be able to make friends there. My father would enjoy it more but he doesn't want to leave my mother alone and won't pay for anyone to stay with her.
They hate going somewhere for dinner. It is a bit of a hike and my father is sort of pathetic pushing my mother's wheelchair because he has gotten weak too. But I keep encouraging them to go instead of doing takeout because it gets them out of the aparetment into the community.
My fahter is so insecure. The kids and I had dinner there last Monday night. He kept pointing out how dressed up people were. Well, yes, some seem to be pretending they live at a resort or are on a cruise ship but maybe he needs to not be a slob at home and then he could wear the shirt and pants he has on. He even said I wasn't dressed up enough! Yikes. And he was all fussed up because the kids had on tennis shoes and shorts, two no no's according the rules. Well I called and they said it was fine for kids and my kids don't even have shoes that aren't tennis shoes! Anyhoo, for the most part people were not fancy but I guess if a woman puts a scarf around her neck, it must be dress up for him.
It is such a shame that they didn't do this five years ago. When they were in better shape and could have enjoyed the activities and made friends. Then they would have a support network there.
Instead, it basically is me. The other night I was talking to my father and he was complaining how my mother doesn't have any interest in anything. And it is true. The two months in the nursing home made things worse I think. But there is also something about the dynamic between the two of them. My father criticizes things she does so she just has given up. She didn't move one ornament that I put out. But when she was here and in really bad shape she still managed to get out on my porch and trim plants and was much more interactive with us.
In a way I think she would be better here with me but as my father reiterated at the doc appt, his VA doc told him he could live another 20 years and since I came to my senses that I can't live with him, this is the best option.
I have been trying to disengage on managing their affairs. My mom sees the surgeon today and I am not going. They have someone at the hospital who will bring a wheelchair and wait until my father parks the car. I did notice last time that my father walks down through the garage instead of taking the elevator. I asked him why and told him that there are handicapped parking spots on each floor near the elevator and that is what he should do. He said he didn't know where the spots were. This is the kind of stupid little stuff that my father would have figured out on his own. But yes he is getting worse so when I am able to point stuff out that will help, I do.
And finally under the title of ... working. I AM! I am finally back in the swing of recruiting, getting my head wrapped around all I had learned and learning more and still liking it.
And so it goes ...
Let's see. Under the title ... no good deed ... I posted a bunch of the crap furniture still left at my parent's apt under free on Craigs List. Was to meet three different people there on Sunday. I couldn't believe the response. I was going to do freecycle but it was takign too long for the moderators to approve my membership so I just did Craigs List. One of the things I needed to get rid of was my mothers dresser and mirror which is too big for Glen Meadows. I called late art deco and posted a pic. Well, I could tell a lot of the responses were people who fix stuff and resell. Then a guy who says he has five kids and money is tight and they would love it ... well eventhough he wasn't first, (my barometer of who I would give what to) I told him he could have it and he was happy and he was the one who didn't show! So now I have to set up another time and this time I will give it to some little entrepreneur who will indeed show up. I still need to get the loveseat and cedar chest from there to here and I still haven't gone through the storage locker. ack. But we are getting there!
Under the title ... SOS ... we have a team meeting with Henry's teachers on Friday. They requested it. Already. Missy's response first off was that she couldn't possibly get off work to go and second that she didn't like the idea of him being labeled already. Um. He must be failing on his interims. I don't really think the teachers called a meeting just for the heck of it. Ah, I so missed this paranoia and problems this summer.
Under the title of ... how do I feel ... I must say ... with my hands. hah. I feel fine. Yesterday I did go to the cancer schmancer website of Fran Drescher who had the same cancer I did and how she is celebrating 7 years cancer free. In my mind it just feels like I had an operation. But I guess having to get a pap smear every three months for a couple of years will remind me that ... I am out of the woods but I can still see a tree or two.
Under the title of ... my parents ... well. I went there last Friday as they both had a doctor's appt with their doc. One of the few GOOD things my father actually has to say about anything is that their doc sees patients at Glen Meadows. They both put on a brave front and smile and everything is fine. I know I do that to some extent with my doc too but ... Then my cousin came to visit so I stayed and we all went to lunch in the cafeteria. She treated which made my father nuts (he is gracious with ... other people) but then she told me for the four of us it was less than $7!!!!!!!!!!!!! My cousin and my father each got chicken a la king and my mother and I had a salad. At these prices no wonder so many of the residents eat breakfast and lunch there!
They are overwhelmed by how friendly (nosey) everyone is. They really like to descend on fresh meat -- stopping by, inviting them to dinner (this is a big thing here but it kind of funny since it is free for everyone), helping them find their way around. Unfortunately with my mother's dementia and hearing issues, she just nods and smiles at people. She will not be able to make friends there. My father would enjoy it more but he doesn't want to leave my mother alone and won't pay for anyone to stay with her.
They hate going somewhere for dinner. It is a bit of a hike and my father is sort of pathetic pushing my mother's wheelchair because he has gotten weak too. But I keep encouraging them to go instead of doing takeout because it gets them out of the aparetment into the community.
My fahter is so insecure. The kids and I had dinner there last Monday night. He kept pointing out how dressed up people were. Well, yes, some seem to be pretending they live at a resort or are on a cruise ship but maybe he needs to not be a slob at home and then he could wear the shirt and pants he has on. He even said I wasn't dressed up enough! Yikes. And he was all fussed up because the kids had on tennis shoes and shorts, two no no's according the rules. Well I called and they said it was fine for kids and my kids don't even have shoes that aren't tennis shoes! Anyhoo, for the most part people were not fancy but I guess if a woman puts a scarf around her neck, it must be dress up for him.
It is such a shame that they didn't do this five years ago. When they were in better shape and could have enjoyed the activities and made friends. Then they would have a support network there.
Instead, it basically is me. The other night I was talking to my father and he was complaining how my mother doesn't have any interest in anything. And it is true. The two months in the nursing home made things worse I think. But there is also something about the dynamic between the two of them. My father criticizes things she does so she just has given up. She didn't move one ornament that I put out. But when she was here and in really bad shape she still managed to get out on my porch and trim plants and was much more interactive with us.
In a way I think she would be better here with me but as my father reiterated at the doc appt, his VA doc told him he could live another 20 years and since I came to my senses that I can't live with him, this is the best option.
I have been trying to disengage on managing their affairs. My mom sees the surgeon today and I am not going. They have someone at the hospital who will bring a wheelchair and wait until my father parks the car. I did notice last time that my father walks down through the garage instead of taking the elevator. I asked him why and told him that there are handicapped parking spots on each floor near the elevator and that is what he should do. He said he didn't know where the spots were. This is the kind of stupid little stuff that my father would have figured out on his own. But yes he is getting worse so when I am able to point stuff out that will help, I do.
And finally under the title of ... working. I AM! I am finally back in the swing of recruiting, getting my head wrapped around all I had learned and learning more and still liking it.
And so it goes ...
