andsoitgoestoo

**Please note ... I was interrupted writing this by a call from Glen Meadows ... It gets a little more interesting!

They are in! Together. As I said at lunch, aren't you glad you two can bicker all the time now? :)

I had Henry make a welcome home sign. Well he made one and in his true fashion, he rushed through it and it was crap. This from a talented artist. So I another one with him. And it looked fun. We pasted all kinds of fun crap on it. Those were the days when I could put all sorts of little doodads and a glue bottle in front of him and he would go to town. Now getting him to do anything other than electronics is painful.

I stopped at Giant and got a balloon and flowers (and vanilla icecream, the only thing my father forgot at the store so I picked it up so he didn't have to leave my mother sitting in a hot car after the doctor's visit tomorrow). Then I headed over to the apt to wait for them. I let my father get my mother from the nursing home. In my neurotic state I was worried how much he has messed up my newly organized apt but it wasn't bad. The blinds were all shut and he hadn't made the bed. Once they are settled they will get linens and towel service but it was not in place when my father moved in on Thrusday. So I made the bed with my linens, and put a crocheted bedspread that they love on it and a stuffed animal from my mother's childhood ... oh what was it ... a monkey? but both my cousins when we packed the apt remembered it ... it's name is Mort. She was so glad to see him on her bed she picked him up and hugged him. I did good.

My mom liked the apt and went right to the patio and sat down. She liked the view which is nice but as my father is wont to point out ... is it not like their balcony in their Ridge Gardens apt. Nope.

Oh, the first thing my mother wanted was a beer. At 11am. Good for her. To celebrate. She was in the nursing home for 2 months which she laughed at me when I said that ... no sense of time ... yeah it was only a few days. ugh.

So we had lunch. I offered to make it. Of course my tuna salad didn't meet muster. It wasn't how my father makes it. Welp. From now on they are on their own.

My mom and I were watching our soap opera when the independent living nurse showed up. They both had to get TB tests ... rules. My father had to go through everything we had just said to her last Friday. Gawd these people are very patient. You have to be to work with the elderly. So we were trying to figure out whether she can take a shower with her dressing and I had to call the nursing home because that wasn't clear on the discharge papers. They said she can shower with the dressing on and then change it after her shower. My father said he didn't want to do that so the nurse said she could come and do it but there would be a charge. My father asks if medicare pays for that and the nurse said no. He didn't understand that homecare it not an insurable expense but I didn't try to explain further and I should have. See later.

Oh, at lunch my father said someone had come from Homecare on Friday to talk about my mother's needs. His version was ... someone came to sell him services. My comment was ... oh that was how you saw it. His answer ... yes. He is so paranoid that everyone is trying to rip him off. Maybe that is why I am so naive and think everyone is not.

Whatever. I truly believe they just want to make sure people are safe and healthy and can stay in independent living for as long as possible. He says he is the nurse. He doesn't want to pay $21 an hour for help. He won't even let someone come in and help my mother shower. He starting screaming at me how he is the nurse, he is the nurse and I said can you say that in a normal tone and he said yes and said it again so I said fine, but if she falls it is on you.

Anyhoo, my mother seemed happy but she came out of the bathroom and into the kitchen when I was making lunch and said I have a nice apt here. I said mom, this is YOUR apt! She laughed. Then came back and said why did I think this was your apt? I said because you are a crazy old lady. She laughed again. Oy.

I did get my mother's meds straightened out and put them in the weekly pill thingie. My father was trying to do it but all he does is flit from one thing to another. He knows it. He says that is why he doesn't get anything done. Yep. Watching him today I can see why he made little progress in three days. I guess I will go do her pills every week because my father seemed overwhelmed by that.

So I helped with odds and ends and then told them I had to get back to my other family. As I was leaving my father starts saying he hopes he can do this. Take care of himself and my mother. How he has gone downhill so much recently both mentally and physically. Where was the guy a few hours earlier screaming ... he is the nurse? I know he is old and crazy. I need to remember that but it is making ME crazy how he speaks out of both sides of his mouth.

I stopped back at the grocery store to get stuff for dinner and I was telling the cashier about my day (truly, I wasn't trying to let her know that those two things of adult pullups were not mine) and she was shocked at how old my parents are to be making this move to yet another apt. And I thought, hmmm. Yeah. It is amazing but they really don't need assisted living at this point.

Oh - and I told the cashier and the woman behind me about how people at Glen Meadows kept asking me if I was moving in and how I was horrified and went home and dyed my hair. They roared.

Okay, updates.... I was lying in bed taking a rest (when did I start resting?) with my laptop writing this before I made dinner and I get a call from Glen Meadows. From someone telling me that my mother fell! wtf? I asked who she was and she said security. That it was just protocol. She seemed fine. My father just couldn't get her up. Welp. They got to use the button they push ... help I have fallen and can't get up ... their first day! I was pretty upset. I called. No answer. I was going to run over there after dinner. But I called again later and my father answered. He had gone up to get dinner for them. Instead of them eating in the dining room. You can do that. They just need to eyeball you every day unless you are out of town. Another good safety measure.

My father was nonchalant about the fall. Like he was both other times. It is like he needs to separate from any responsibility. He said she was trying to get to the bathroom and she was opening the closet that holds the washer and dryer. I can imagine it. My father is yelling at her. She gets confused and turns around too fast.

So anyway, I was thinking that maybe the walk is too far for her to the dining room with just the walker. The sidewalk is not totally flat. I told my father that he should use the wheelchair, she can hold the walker, leave the wheelcahir outside the dining room. I could tell he wasn't listening. He doens't listen. So I said it louder and he said don't yell at me (are we a pair or what?) and I said you are so stubborn. He said he wasn't stubborn. hahahahahahah.

And then he goes off about the medicare and homecare issue. He wishes they moved to the Presbyterian home. WTF? One of the reasons they didn't move there was because their nursing home doesn't participate in medicare and I thought that was too risky. If one of them had to be in there it woudl be 6700 a month!!!!!!!! Add to that this is assisted living so they only get a two room suite and no kitchen. My father would have hated that. He is nuts.

I will have to explain again today. Because after I take the kids to their dental appointments this morning, I am going to meet my parents at St. Joe's to meet with the surgeon. Hmmmmmm. And when am I working? Tomorrow I see my gyn for my 6 week checkup. You know some people don't even go back to work until 6 weeks and I have managed to pack and move my parents!!!!!!!!!!!!

I hope by this time next week I am just living a normal life working and dealing with rotten kids.

And so I hope it will go ...